The Second Date
by Dr.Indigo
Summary: Sequel to The Game. In her quest to turn Wander into a villain worthy of being her husband, Dominator seeks out a supposed Ring of Invincibility, which sits atop the Blasteroid Asteroid Formation. However, once she gets there, she quickly discovers that her would-be future hubby has somehow landed himself smack-dab in the middle of the biggest smack down in history.
1. Chapter 1

Hello everybody, and welcome to my new story. In case you didn't bother reading the description, this is a sequel to my previous Wander Over Yonder story, "The Game". Not much else to say, except that Wander Over Yonder is owned by Disney, so let's just jump right into it. Enjoy.

The Second Date: Chapter 1.

Steam…

The ultimate instrument for cleansing the body, the mind, and the soul.

This is a fact accepted by over one hundred million species throughout the known universe.

However, unbeknownst to all but a select few, this hot, wet, swirling vapor can do much more than just open pores.

When used properly, and in the right intensity, steam can open doors.

Doors into the past, the future, and even into other planes of existence.

Which is why, for the past eleven or so minutes, the lovely lime-skinned seductress known professionally as Lord Dominator sat quietly within her black marble bath, staring unblinkingly into a sea of pure white mist.

"I am ready." She spoke up suddenly; a sinister grin spreading across her face. "Let the ritual begin."

With that said, Dominator gave her neck a few sharp cracks, and after a quick clearing of the throat, she spoke again.

"I give you a coin I carved from bone. I give you a song I stole from the earth." She chanted, her voice echoing off the high ceiling of her private bath. "I give you a knife from the deserts of Skrill. And a stick that I stuck through a blind man's throat."

As the strange words left her mouth, the black marble columns that lined the room began to vibrate; giving off a loud high-pitched whine that Dominator didn't seem to mind.

"I give you a claw I ripped from a cat. I give you a name that must never be spoken." She continued; her voice growing steadily louder. "I give you the blood I drained from a stone. And the feather I plucked from a peacock's tail."

As the whining grew louder and louder, the waters in her swimming pool sized bath began to churn. And yet still she remained unfazed.

"I call you, O Lord of the Mists! I summon you with poison and with passion! I light the way and open the gates!" Dominator continued fervently, clearly about to reach the climax. "Coin and Song! Knife and Stick! Claw and Name! Blood and Feather! Through the Mist! Through the Mist! Through the Mist! Through the Mist! Through the Mist! I command you! Appear!"

Suddenly, a loud splash was heard; as if something very big and very heavy had just been dropped into the massive bath. Moments later, the whining ceased and was immediately replaced by a loud unearthly voice.

" _ **What fool dares to summon Ogilac, Lord of the Mists and Breaker of Minds?**_ " asked something, in a voice that was neither male nor female. " _ **What poor, unfortunate creature had the arrogance to rouse me from my sound slumber and drag me to this den of self-indulgence?**_ "

The owner of the voice was obscured by the steam, but Dominator could just barely make out a silhouette. Whatever it was, it was big; at least five times her own size. It also appeared to have three long swanlike heads and an incalculable number of writhing tentacles.

" _ **What lowly, insignificant insect has the gall to…**_ "

"Cut the sales pitch Oogie. It's only me." Dominator interrupted playfully. However, instead of enraging the otherworldly entity, the lime-skinned queen of evil earned a delighted squeal.

" _ **Deedee~ Oh, my dear sweet child! Why didn't you say so?**_ " the malevolent entity, apparently named Oogie, gushed with almost girlish glee. " _ **Oh my Grop, how long has it been?**_ "

"Too long, old friend. Much too long."

" _ **Clearly! I mean, just look at you. All grown up and pretty. Just like your mother.**_ "

"Oh, stop it Oogie." Dominator replied cutely; a touch of pink appearing on her greenish cheeks. "You're embarrassing me."

" _ **Sorry, I just can't help myself.**_ " Oogie apologized before letting out a jolly snort. " _ **So tell me darling, to what do I owe the pleasure of this summons?**_ "

"Well… it's kind of a long story, but I'll skip to the main point." Dominator began, pausing only for a moment for dramatic effect. "I'm in love!"

" _ **O-M-Goodness~**_ " the silhouetted horror squealed excitedly. " _ **Well don't just sit there leaving me in suspense! Give me all the juicy bits! What's his name? Where did you meet him? How good is he at giving foot rubs?**_ "

"In that order; his name is Wander, we met when I made my big debut in this hick galaxy, and I'm not really sure, but now that you've put the image in my head I can't wait to find out!"

" _ **Well, I'm just thrilled to pieces for you darling. Tell me, what's he like?**_ "

"Oogie, he's the one."

" _ **That's nice dear, but can you be a little more specific?**_ "

"No Oogie, I mean he's 'the' one."

A sudden silence fell over the room; almost as if Dominator's vague declaration had eliminated all the sound in the universe. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the eldritch horror spoke up again.

" _ **You… you don't mean he's… 'the one', do you?**_ "

"That's right~ The very 'one' from the prophecy you told me when I was a little girl." The lime-skinned villainess professed joyously. "The Traveler. The Bard. The Good Samaritan. The man whose love for me will rot his pure heart from within, turning him into my King of Darkness."

" _ **Are you sure?**_ "

"One thousand percent." Dominator answered. "All the signs are there. He's a nomad, he sings, he goes out of his way to help people; just like you described. Plus, he's just so darn cute and corruptible that I wanna cuddle him forever on a mountain of fluffy pillows~"

" _ **Yes… well, that all sounds just lovely. But what does that have to do with me?**_ " asked the monstrous silhouette confusedly. " _ **If you're this smitten, then there can be no question that you've found your man. So what do you need me for?**_ "

"Well… it's like this, Oogie." Dominator began. "See, I've already taken the first step; I've planted the Seeds of Attraction deep within his pure heart. Now I just need to find the best way nurture them, so that they grow into the pitch black Roses of Lust and Desire. Any suggestions?"

" _ **Ah~ So it's another look into the future that you seek?**_ "

"If it's not too much trouble."

" _ **For you my dear, never. Just give me a minute.**_ "

And with that said, the giddy horror began to hum.

" _ **Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm~**_ " Oogie droned; causing the surrounding pillars to vibrate once again. " _ **Yessss~ I can see through the Grand Illusion and peel back the Veil of Time~ Yessss~ I see… I see… A Ring!**_ "

"A ring?"

" _ **Yesss~ A Ring surrounded by a sea of grasping palms~**_ "

"Anything else?"

" _ **Hold on, just give a moment. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm~ I see… two figures~ A man and a woman~ Standing side by side~ Hand in hand~ Amidst an ocean of blood and death~**_ _"_

"Uh-huh, what else?" asked Dominator, suddenly sounding very excited.

" _ **As the world around them crumbles and falls, the two figures stare longingly into each other's eyes~ Slowly their faces move closer and closer together~ Until~**_ "

"Until?"

" _ **Until they kiss~**_ "

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~" the vile villainess squealed like a lovesick schoolgirl, as her heart exploded with unbridled joy.

" _ **It's been a while since I've been in this dimension, was that a sad sound or a happy sound?**_ "

"It was happy, Oogie." Dominator replied as she allowed herself to calm down a little. "Happy, Happy, Happy."

After about a minute or so, the lime-skinned beauty let out deep sigh; finally regaining her usual composure.

"So, let me see if I get this straight." She began; her tone both playful yet matter-of-factly. "All I have to is find this ring or whatever, and that will somehow lead to an epic and fully consensual make out session between me and my little Pumpkin?"

" _ **Well, I can't say for sure. My visions aren't always so literal. The ring may very well be a metaphor for something else. As could everything else I saw. Even the kiss itself could be symbolic for any number of other… Your little what?**_ "

"Never mind, just finish explaining."

" _ **Yes, well… as I was saying, don't take my prophecy at face value. And don't try to force it either. Just go about your business as usual and be open to whatever the universe presents you.**_ "

"Okay, I'll keep that in mind." Said Dominator with grateful grin. "Thanks Oogie. You're the best."

" _ **Anytime, my sweet. Anytime.**_ "

XXX

(Three Weeks Later)

 _Click_

"Boring."

 _Click_

"Lame."

 _Click_

"Dumb."

 _Click_

"Obviously a scam."

 _Click_

"Ugh, that is one ugly cat."

 _Click_

It is a little-known fact that when a villain, especially one as feared and as powerful as Lord Dominator, suddenly finds him or herself with absolutely nothing even remotely evil to do, nine times out of ten their first instinct is to do random searches on the internet; the tenth time is usually a tossup between sleeping all day or ordering takeout, but that is neither here nor there.

All that matters is that Dominator was bored beyond measure, and the local broadband wasn't helping.

"Jeez! What's with this ultra-lame galaxy and its ultra-lame internet!" the lime-skinned villainess exclaimed as she leaned back into her command chair and huffed childishly. "No cool fighting games, no decent shopping, and way too many stupid cute cat videos!"

Letting out a groan of frustration, Dominator casually fired a tiny stream of lava from her index finger at one of her adjacent Dom-Bots; first impaling it, then causing it to exploded. With that little bit of catharsis out of the way, she then returned to her seemingly futile quest for entertainment.

"Oh well, I guess I'll check out the Galactic Villain Message Board." She said as she typed in the site's URL. "Maybe one of those second-rate hacks actually found something worth stealing."

With one final click of the mouse, Dominator was on the Message Board and almost immediately her eyes lit up like supernova. Within the last thirty minutes, the site had become flooded with new posts and comments; all of them carrying a similar theme.

 **MacDaddyKingShark12:**

 _Dudes! There's this Ring of Invincibility on top of the Blasteroid Asteroid Formation, and I'm totally gonna nab it!_

 **SkeletorElectrico#1SuperStar** replied to **MacDaddyKingShark12:**

 _Fat chance Fish-Face! I'm gonna get that ring first, and then I'm gonna use it to destroy you and everyone else who gets in my way!_

 **DiabolicalMonteCristo** replied to **SkeletorElectrico#1SuperStar:**

 _You're both idiots if you think you're going to get to that ring before I do._

 **WingDingKing34:**

 _The battle for the Ring of Invincibility has grown quite fierce. I only arrived a few minutes ago and already I've lost nine… uh, twelve Wingmen to enemy fire. It looks like just about every Level 6 Villain and above is here, but so far no sign of Lord Dominator. If that psycho gets the ring first, we're all as good as dead._

 **PitchBlackTesseract** replied to **WingDingKing34:**

 _Dude, whoever gets that ring first, everyone else is as good as dead._

 **BloodStainedPussyCat813** replied to **PitchBlackTesseract:**

 _Unless Lord Hater gets to it first. That guy's so dumb he'll probably break it, or lose it, or drop it in a black hole before he can use it._

 **DrBananaMan62** replied to **BloodStainedPussyCat813:**

 _I'd say that statement 'Rings' true!_

 **PitchBlackTesseract** replied to **DrBananaMan62:**

 _ROTFL~_

 **WatchHogAccountant99:**

 _O-Holy-Cow! This battle is nuts! Lasers blasting, explosions everywhere, guys getting thrown at other guys; this is turning into a real brouhaha._

 **TheFlamingPigGod** replied to **WatchHogAccountant99:**

 _I know what you mean. I just saw that that old geezer Mandrake set some poor guy on fire._

 **WatchHogAccountant99** replied to **TheFlamingPigGod:**

 _I heard about that, but I thought it was just an urban legend._

 **TheFlamingPigGod** replied to **WatchHogAccountant99:**

 _Dude, this battle started twenty minutes ago. How could there already be urban legends about it?_

 **WatchHogAccountant99** replied to **TheFlamingPigGod:**

 _IDK._

 **MolarwithaMonocleFetish0982:**

 _Hey, what's everybody talking about?_

There were at least two or three dozen more comments relating to this subject, but Dominator didn't bother reading them. She didn't need to. She already had all the information she needed.

"So… there's a Ring of Ultimate Power out there and every second-rate conqueror and two-bit miscreant in this stinkin' galaxy is trying to take it for themselves, eh?" she mused to herself as she recalled a certain conversation she'd had several weeks prior. "How very interesting. Computer! How far is it to the Blateroid Asteroid Formation?"

" **Calculating…** " replied her ship's onboard computer as it began searching its massive databanks for the answer. " **The Blasteroid Asteroid Formation is exactly 2.45 Parsecs from our current location.** "

"Excellent…" said Dominator in a stereotypically sinister fashion. "Fire a long-range probe! I wanna see what I'm getting into before I bust in there and school all those dorks."

XXX

(Five Minutes Later)

"Ugh!" Lord Dominator groaned childishly as she impatiently tapped her fingers against the arm of her command chair. "How much longer is this going to take?"

" **Calculating…** " replied the ship's onboard computer. " **Estimated time it will take to synchronize with long-range probe: twenty seconds.** "

"Well can hurry it up? If I don't see some violence soon, I'm gonna start making my own."

" **Synchronization complete. Visual link established with long-range probe.** "

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Now put it up on the big screen!"

With an almost fearful urgency, the ship's computer complied and a split-second later Dominator's black heart swelled with unimaginable joy.

The scene playing out before her was like something from a dream. Watchdogs fighting Fist Fighters, Schmartians fighting Beefeaters, lasers blasting everything, explosions going off everywhere, guys getting set on fire, and sitting right at the top was a great big ruby red ring of invincibility; the perfect cherry for this sundae of carnage.

"Oooo~ Ho~ Ho~ Ho~ Ho~ Hoooo~" the lime-skinned villainess squealed with delight. "Oh man, I can't believe all these idiots are in the same place. And they're all practically clawing each other's eyes out just so they can snatch some dinky little Power Ring. I'm almost sorry I have to bust in and remind them all who's boss."

Dominator was just about to burst into a fit of evil laughter, when she noticed something very strange at the bottom of the screen.

"What the heck is that?"

" **Insufficient Data. Cannot provide appropriate response.** "

"Just shut up and zoom in where I'm pointing!"

" **Obeying Command.** "

And with that said, the camera zoomed in on a small rock formation located at the very bottom of the asteroid field. There, much to her immeasurable shock and amusement, she saw the unmistakable form of Zbornak dorsal fin and an oh-so familiar green hat.

"O~ What is this?" Dominator asked, suddenly sounding amorous as well as excited. "The biggest rumble in the universe and my sweet little Pumpkin and his loser sidekick are caught smackdab in the middle of it."

She paused momentarily to lean back into her chair and shudder with ecstasy.

"Oh~ Mama like, Mama like~" Dominator swooned before finally straightening herself up. "This is going to be… The. Best. Second. Date. EVER~"

End Notes: And so ends chapter one. Right now, I'm planning on this one being a little bit longer than the first one. At least four or five chapters, depending on what I want to do with it. Anyway, be sure to fav, follow, and leave a review if you liked it. Catch you on the flipside.


	2. Chapter 2

Hello everybody, and welcome to the next installment of "The Second Date". Thanks to everyone who faved, followed, and commented on the first chapter. Seriously guys, your support means a lot. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Now on with the show!

The Second Date: Chapter 2.

Life…

Life is hard.

No matter who you are or where you come from, life is hard.

From the day you're born to the day you kick the bucket, life is just one random headache after another.

At least, that was the opinion of a certain blue-skinned Zbornak named Sylvia; though considering she was the companion of an enigmatic, hyperactive, help-aholic being from another galaxy, one could argue that her opinion on the subject might be a little biased.

Oh sure, traveling the galaxy and basically being a hero had its highpoints, but there was no denying that being friends with a guy like Wander got her mixed up in all sorts of dangerous and quite frankly _stupid_ situations. Whether it was going on an _epic quest_ to return someone's lost sock or jumping into the mouth of an erupting volcano to save a nest full of ungrateful birds, her best buddy's borderline psychotic need to help those in need put Sylvia in positions that would break even the most hardened of warriors.

However, even on the Wander Scale, their most recent predicament was a real humdinger.

 _ **BOOM!**_

 _ **ZAP!**_

 _ **BANG!**_

 _ **CHING!**_

 _ **BLAM!**_

 _ **POW!**_

 _ **AHHH!**_

All across the rocky spire known as the Blasteroid Asteroid Formation, every villain, miscreant, ne'er-do-well, and cape wearing weirdo in galaxy was clawing and/or blasting at each other's throats. Some came because they had an ax to grind, others came because they had something to prove, but no matter what their secondary reasons were, they all had one endgame in mind. Namely, to grab the Ring of Invincibility that sits at the very top and use it to take over the universe. Just your standard Intergalactic Supervillain Modus Operandi. However, what none of these brigands knew was that this Ring of Ultimate Power was much more than it appeared to be.

Or much less, depending on your perspective.

"Okay, so you planted an 'Ultimate Weapon of Power' and then you told everyone in the galaxy about it, and you didn't expect every villain in the galaxy to come and claim it?" asked Sylvia in exasperation, as she hunkered down behind a small rock formation with her best friend; who had apparently been the catalyst for the sixty-way slugfest they were currently stranded in.

"Nuh-uh," her orange accomplice replied with his usual air of childlike innocence. "I was just hoping for Hater and Dominator."

"But why?"

"If Hater's gonna ask Dominator to get married he's gonna need a ring." He answered, acting as if she had just asked the most obvious question in the universe.

" _ **What?**_ " replied Sylvia as she felt the full force of this shocking reveal hit her like a cinderblock to the brain.

"Well… actually that part's kinda hard to explain right now, but trust me, I know what I'm talkin' about." The orange nomad said as he suspiciously and uncharacteristically dodged her question, before immediately readopting his trademark pep. "Besides, Hater's always talking about how he wants a girlfriend. So I devised the perfect setup to get Hater and Dominator to show up here. They'll fall in love, that love will cancel out all their evil, and everything will be great forever. Especially for me…uh… I mean them."

Despite the assuredness in her friend's voice, the 'elder' Zbornak still held a few reservations about his plan, and she decided to express them to him in a way she knew he would understand.

"Are you out of your fraking mind? That is the most irrational… I can't even begin to tell you how completely… Are you on some new medication you forgot to tell me about?" Sylvia began in a chastising tone, however, after a quick deep breath, she calmed down a little and tried a much less caustic approach. "Wander, I get it. You wanna help everybody, no matter how many times they try to destroy us. It's who you are. But you've gotta admit, even by your standards, this whole situation has gone completely off the rails."

"Okay, I'll admit it," the orange nomad said in an unsettlingly calm manner. "My plan may have hit a _little_ bit of a speedbump, but I still think…"

"A little speed bump? _A little speedbump!_ " the 'elder' Zbornak shouted, abandoning even the pretense of a gentler approach. "Wander, we're stranded in the middle of a frakin' warzone! Surrounded by every short-fused costumed nut-bag in the galaxy! We might as well have targets on our backs!"

"Sylvia, Sylvia, Sylvia," Wander replied in a tone one usually reserves for small children. "I hear what you're saying, but just trust me on this. My plan's gonna work. I can feel my bones. Sure, it might be dangerous, but you know what they say, 'Love is like a Battlefield'."

"This is an actual battlefield!" Sylvia yelled; clearly having no more patience for her friend's seemingly insane idea. "Wander, I'm sorry, but this time I'm putting my foot down. If we stay here we're gonna die. So let's just scram while we're still in one piece. Face it, your plan's a bust."

"Oh~ I don't know; I think it still has some potential."

"Yeah, well nobody asked you. So just butt ou… wait, what?"

It was at this moment that Sylvia realized that she and Wander were no longer alone. There, sitting right beside her little orange buddy, was a young woman; a young woman unlike any she had ever seen before in all her travels. She was tall, at least a foot taller than herself, or so the Zbornak guested; with an almost perfect hourglass figure and legs that would drive any man crazy. She had lime-green skin and snow white hair that made her look like a backup singer for a punk rock band. She was dressed all in black; save for the bright red heart on her chest and her strange yellow gloves. But by far the most striking thing about her, at least in Sylvia's opinion, was her face. Those wide pink eyes and that Cheshire-like smile; they seemed so out of place with the rest of her, and yet they were also strangely familiar.

"Oh, I'm sorry, was this a private conversation?" the stranger asked in a playful, almost mocking tone. "Oopsie~ My bad."

"W-What are you doing here?" asked Wander, sounding more than a little unnerved. Unfortunately, his unease seemed to amuse the mysterious intruder, as her Cheshire grin grew wider and even more mischievous.

"What am I doing here? You invited me, Sweetie. Remember?"

"No, I mean yes, I mean, what are you doing all the way down here?" the orange nomad replied, sounding uncharacteristically flustered; much to Sylvia's dismay. "The Ring of Invincibility's all the way at the top. Don't you, I don't know, wanna go steal it, or something?"

"Yeah… about that," the strange woman began. "You see; I don't really go for jewelry. I'm more of a flowers and chocolates kinda girl. _Hint-Hint_."

"But it's a Ring of Ultimate Power! Who couldn't use one of those, am I right?"

" _Pfft!_ Ultimate Power. Invincibility. Where's the fun in that? Besides, I'm way more interested in what's going on over there." The green woman said in a disturbingly Wanderish fashion as she gestured towards the insane melee not ten feet away from them. "Honestly, I was expecting dinner and dancing or maybe a movie. But _this_ , luring every second-rate reprobate in galaxy into a battle royale, and all over some cheap hunk of sugar, this is practically spoiling me. Oh~ You are just the best boyfriend ever!"

" _Boyfriend?_ " asked the blue Zbornak, though it was clearly meant as an exclamation. "Okay, that does it! Wander, you've been piecemealing me bombshells all day and quite frankly I'm sick of it. So you'd better start giving me some straight answers pronto! Starting with what's going on and who the heck is _she_?"

"Sylvia, I'd love to tell you the truth, but to be honest this whole situation is sorta complicated." Wander explained, attempting to sound sympathetic to his deeply confused comrade. "Sorta really complicated."

"Aw~ Now Pumpkin, be nice." The strange woman said in a sickeningly sweet tone. "If the poor dear is this confused, then you might as well let her in on our little secret. It's only fair~"

"Well… alright." Wander relented, pausing only for a moment to let out a deep cleansing sigh. "Sylvia… this is… Lord Dominator."

"Say _what?_ "

"Yeah, and the thing is… she's kinda… in love with me."

"Say _**WHAT?**_ "

"Kinda over simplifying it, don't you think, Shnookums?" Dominator chimed in, sounding positively impish. "I mean, there's a little more to it than that."

"Then why don't **you** try explaining it to me." The Zbornak suggested; her tone even but her words laced with venom.

"Okay then. Would you like me to start with when I drugged the both of you and brought Wander back to my ship so I could seduce him, or do you want me to skip ahead to the part where I reveal my sinister plan to turn Wander into a supervillain so I can marry him and we can become the cutest evil couple in the universe?" the lime-skinned seductress asked innocently, before her tone became even more disgustingly bubbly. "Hey, what do you know, I just told both stories at the same time. Ain't that just a kick in the teeth?"

"No, **BUT THIS IS!** "

And before either of them even knew what had happened, Sylvia delivered a devastating roundhouse straight to Dominator's jaw; causing her to fall flat on her back like a reeling terrapin.

For the briefest of moments, the blue Zbornak felt a great sense of pride wash over her. Not only had she just clocked one of the greatest threats to the galaxy since Lord Hater, but she had also just knocked the wind out of a trampy little skank who was eyeing her best pal like a piece of meat. Unfortunately, this sense of accomplishment died a split-second later when she felt a set of glowing hot tendrils wrap around her throat.

"Don't get cute with me, Thunder-Thighs!" Dominator said in a low but threatening tone as she picked herself off the ground and pulled her potential victim closer to her face. "I don't need a muscle suit or an army of lava-bots to pound a lowlife like you into pudding!"

"Do your… worst…" Sylvia taunted in spite of the vicelike grip on her windpipe. "You… scrawny… little… bimbo!"

"Why you insolent little…"

"Ladies! Ladies, please!" Wander intervened, sounding both anxious and diplomatic. "Let's not let a minor skirmish turn into something ugly. Hasn't there been enough violence for one day?"

"There's no such thing as 'enough violence'." Dominator countered, before quickly switching back to her bubbly demeanor. "But if it will make you happy, Muffin, I'll let your little friend off easy this time."

And with that said she released the Zbornak's throat and let her drop to the ground like a sack of potatoes.

"Thank you." Said the wanderer.

"My pleasure." Replied the villainess.

"Witch." Muttered the Zbornak.

"Hag." Spat the lime-skinned seductress, before returning her attention to the brouhaha just beyond the boulders. "Ooooo~ I think I just saw someone's head explode! Classic~"

While the Greatest Villain in the Galaxy was busy gushing and squealing like a giddy schoolgirl, Sylvia took advantage of her momentary distraction to speak privately with her orange accomplice.

"Hey, thanks for saving my neck back there, buddy." She said with hushed gratitude.

"No problem, Syl." Wander replied with one of his trademark toothy grins.

"Now let's get the heck out of here while she's distracted."

"But we can't leave yet. What about my plan?"

"Will you forget about your stupid plan already! Even if it wasn't a longshot, she already heard you…"

"And I can still hear you." Dominator said bluntly; apparently finished with her fangirling. "And as much as I hate to admit it, I gotta agree with Tubby on this one. I wouldn't go out with a chump like Hater if someone pointed a gun at my head."

To illustrate her point, the lime-skinned villainess made her hand into a finger gun and placed the 'barrel' right against the side of her head.

"See? Still not into him."

"B-B-But, you have so much in common." Wander reasoned; sounding surprisingly diplomatic in spite of his stammer. "You both like skulls. You both like music. You both want to control the galaxy."

"He's a loser." Dominator interrupted. "On his best day, that guy's only a Level 6, and even then only because he has an army of goons and a warship. On his own he's like a Level 4 at best. Whereas I, even on my worst day, am a solid 10. So I won't settle for anything less."

"But if you'd just give him a chance I know you two would be perfect for each other." The orange nomad said, almost pleadingly. "Trust me, I've only got your best interests at heart."

To this, the lime-skinned harlot replied with a playful, yet strangely imposing giggle.

"Aw~ Sweetheart," she said in a tone both cute and condescending. "You really believe that don't you."

"Of course I believe it." Wander replied, sounding only slightly intimidated. "It's the truth."

"Oh no it's not~" Dominator singsonged. "And do you wanna know how I know?"

Neither Wander nor Sylvia gave a reply, mostly because they both knew it wasn't really a question.

"I know because this little plan of yours was sloppy." She stated, in a tone both bubbly and snarky. "Based on what I've learned about you since I came to this hick galaxy, which is a lot FYI, you're capable of coming up with plans that are both incredibly intricate and amazingly simple, sometimes right off the top of your head."

"Um, thanks, I think."

"However, by way of contrast, this latest scheme of yours was pathetically flawed from the get-go." Dominator said cuttingly. "Any grade-schooler could tell you all the ways this plan could go wrong, and yet you decided to ahead with it anyway. Which can only mean that you came up with it out of desperation."

"That's ridiculous!" countered Wander; sounding uncharacteristically defensive. "W-W-Why would I be desperate?"

"Gee, I don't know~" she replied cutely. "Maybe it's because deep down you know you can't beat me. Deep down you know that I'm gonna win. That I'm gonna make you love me and turn your heart as black as pitch."

"T-That's not true!"

"Oh~ But I think it is. I think you got so scared that you went with the first idea you could come up with, even though you knew something like this might happen." She said, gesturing towards the mayhem going on just a few feet away. "So in a desperate attempt to save your soul, you tried to pawn me off on your worst enemy, and in that supreme act of selfishness, you condemned tens of thousands of semi-innocent people to a painful, agonizing death. And you thought you didn't have what it takes to be a villain."

As Dominator's expression grew ever more cheerful, Wander's grew ever more pale. Sylvia could see that her little buddy was starting to feel the full brunt the villainess' cruel remarks, and that made her blood boil.

"Oh~ This is just too much~" Dominator squealed as she shuddered in what looked like pure ecstasy. "Do you wanna head over to my place, or do you wanna just start fooling around right here? Because I haven't been this turned on in ever!"

That was the final straw. Nobody messes with her little pal; especially not some smug little tramp who dresses like a cosplayer. So, with all the rage and power of a mad bull, Sylvia grabbed the arrogant little so-and-so by the collar of her tacky shirt and raised her up off the ground.

"Alright, that's enough outta you!" she roared with righteous fury. "Now listen here, missy, nobody messes with my pal. So one more word and I'll knock your teeth out. In fact, if you so much as look at my friend in a way I don't like, I'll splatter you're flarf-narfin' grey matter all over the quadrant!"

Unfortunately, this show of force only seemed to amuse the lime-skinned seductress; as she quickly put on one of her trademark Cheshire grins.

"You speak like a poet, Zbornak, but you hit like one too."

"That's it! You asked for it!"

 _ **BOOOOOOOOOOM!**_

Before Sylvia could even try to make good on her threats, the air was suddenly shattered by an explosion of green lightning. Followed swiftly by a thunderous but oh-so familiar cry.

" _ **WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!**_ "

Briefly forgetting what she was doing, the stalwart Zbornak dropped her potential punching bag and peeked over the edge of her hiding place to see what was going on. As expected, her little orange buddy had somehow slipped past her during the ruckus and was currently climbing up the Asteroid Formation, being pursued by an all too familiar cloaked skeleton, who was blasting green lightning at him like a bug zapper possessed.

So in other words, it was just another average Tuesday.

"What the heck is he doing now?" Sylvia asked aloud to no one in particular; her words dripping with worry.

"Beats me, Chubs. But it looks like fun." Replied Dominator; whose words were dripping with excitement. "Wait for me Pumpkin!"

And with said, the lime-skinned lunatic leapfrogged over the boulder and began sprinting into the fray.

"Oh no you don't!" the Zbornak declared boldly as she lunged forward to give chase; only to be stopped dead in her tracks by a sudden sharp tug on her tail. " _Yowch!_ What the…?"

Sylvia spun her neck around to see what was the holdup, and there, much to her complete surprise, she saw a large black sphere of solidified magma incasing the tip of her tail; effectively keeping her pinned in place.

"Sorry Sylvie, but three's a crowd." Dominator taunted as she continued her merry jog. "So why don't you just sit this one out. Behave yourself and I just might save you an extra slice of cake at the wedding. Later Loser~"

And without another word, she vanished into the field of violence.

Back behind the boulders, Sylvia was engulfed with rage. Eyes narrowed, brow furrowed, nostrils flaring; she was just one minor annoyance away from foaming at the mouth.

"This isn't over, Twiggy!" the enraged Zbornak roared as she desperately tried to pull her entrapped tail forward. "Not by a longshot!"

End Notes:

And there you have it. Chapter 2. I gotta say, this was so much fun to write. And all the favs and comments really helped to motivate me. So, again, thank you all so much. Right now I'm planning on making this story about four or five chapters. However, because of all positive attention this series is getting, I'm already started planning three sequels. You guys inspired me. You should be as proud as I am right now. So, until next time, peace.


	3. Chapter 3

Hello everybody and welcome to the next chapter of The Second Date. First of all, I just want to thank everyone who decided to fav, follow, and/or review the last chapter. Seriously guys, all that support really helped motivate me to write this chapter so much quicker than usual. You guys are the best. Secondly, 'Wander over Yonder' and all its characters are owned by Disney. So without any further delay, on with the show!

The Second Date: Chapter 3.

War…

What is it good for?

A question that has plagued the minds of sentient beings throughout recorded history.

Some say it's good for absolutely nothing.

Others say it's the solution to all of life's problems.

And still others say 'what is this 'war' you speak of'.

The point is, that all sentient beings have their own perceptions on the concept of war, and that these perceptions often change throughout the course of an individual's life, depending on their current circumstances.

For example, on this day, in the opinion of a certain blue Zbornak by the name of Sylvia, war was nothing but a hindrance.

All across the Blasteroid Asteroid Formation, epic battles were being waged. Watchdogs vs Fist Fighters, Beefeaters vs Wingmen, and in one very peculiar case, a sentient kitten vs a cube of pure concentrated evil. But while these miscellaneous malcontents were busy fighting tooth and nail against each other, everybody's favorite Zbornak was fighting tooth and nail against her own tail.

After being bamboozled by that slippery skank Dominator, Sylvia's blood was practically boiling. Unfortunately, thanks to the little 'gift' lefty to her by the lime-skinned psychopath, her revenge trip was slowed down to an almost literal crawl. But still she persisted, step by step, inch by inch; fueled by animal rage and righteous fury. For no matter what the danger or how high the cost, she knew in her heart that she had to protect her best buddy from that black hearted harlot.

She had already made it through the majority of the chaos on the bottommost landmass with only a few cuts and bruises; thankfully most of the so-called soldiers were too busy with their own battles to notice her trudge by, and the few that did were total pushovers. She was less than ten feet away from the edge; practically jumping distance from the next platform. So close she could almost taste it.

"Don't worry buddy," she said as she powered through the incredible weight holding her back. "I'm comin'!"

"Not this time, Zbornak!" shouted a familiar voice from out of nowhere.

Before she could even try to react, Sylvia felt a tiny fist clock her in the side of the face, sending her tumbling to the ground. A moment later she felt a tiny boot press into her chest. She didn't even have to open eyes to know what had happened. She had been ambushed by Lord Hater's loyal Second in Command and the true mastermind behind the 'Indomitable' Watchdog Army; the small but deceptively formidable Commander Peepers.

"Well, well, well, what have we here?" the top Watchdog asked rhetorically. "Hello Sylvia, I was wondering when you'd show up."

"Ugh! I don't have time for this!" the blue Zbornak groaned in frustration. "Just get out of my way, you Optic Nerd! I have to get to Wander so I…"

"So the two of you can stop Lord Hater from getting the Ring of Invincibility and once again becoming the Greatest in the Galaxy." Peepers interrupted. "Not on my watch, sister!"

"You don't understand, the ring's a fake! This whole thing is a setup!"

"Yeah right, as if I'd believe anything _you_ say."

"It's the tru… oh forget it!" Sylvia roared in exasperation as she shot back up; sending the supreme watchdog flying backwards. "If the only way to save my pal is to mop the floor with you for like the billionth time, then that's just fine with me!"

"Bring it on, Zbornak." Declared Peepers as he picked himself up off the ground and threw away his uniform; reveling a surprisingly well toned upper body.

"Just hold on a little while longer, buddy." Sylvia muttered to herself softly. "As soon as I'm done with this chump, I'm gonna find that scrawny little tramp and pound her flat."

Then without another word, both she and Peepers lunged toward each other; howling their war cries like the warriors of old.

XXX

A dozen or so levels up, Dominator was having the time of her life.

In just the span of a few minutes, she had already plowed through three massive battle sites and had nary a cut or a bruise to show for it. The rank and file of these so-called armies of evil were like toy soldiers against her awesome might. So far, she hadn't even needed to summon her signature armor or form a single weapon; one by one they all fell by her fists alone. And not a single one of them knew who it was who had so royally trounced them. When this day was done, the survivors would tell their children and their children's children how during the greatest battle in history a mysterious woman appeared out of nowhere, slaughtered thousands of this galaxy's finest, then disappeared into the night. In time she would become a folktale; a legend. Oh, how just the thought of that tickled her insides.

'Still,' she thought to herself as she leapt off one of the smaller landmasses. 'I wish there was at least one villain in this stinking galaxy who could give me a decent fight.'

With a gentle thud, the lime-skinned villainess landed on the next floating platform, which, much to her disappointment, appeared to be deserted.

"Aww poo! There goes my momentum." Dominator pouted childishly, before quickly perking back up. "Oh well, it was fun while it lasted. Time to get back to business~"

And with wicked glee, she began scanning the area in every direction, looking for any clue that might lead her to the whereabouts of her one true love.

"Oh where oh where has my little Pumpkin gone?"

"If you're referrin' to that funny little orange fella in the fancy hat, you just missed him." Replied an anonymous voice with an odd country twang. "If'n I do recall; he should be on one of them-there landmasses up yonder. Hashin' it out with that Sourdough fella."

"Hey thanks." She said cheerily, before quickly remembering that she was supposed to be alone. "Wait, what?"

Lo and behold, there he was. A mysterious stranger; standing where just a second ago there had been only air. And oh what a strange sight he was.

He, for whoever it was so obviously was a _he_ , was a tall, thin, beanpole of a man, just an inch or two shorter than Dominator herself, or so she guessed, with dark blue skin and surprisingly broad shoulders. His face was very much like that of a common vampire bat, save for the aforementioned blue skin and his oversized fangs; which were so long that they almost made him look like a walrus. He was dressed in what looked like a brand-new purple pinstriped suit, with matching brown pants and pair of black and white pointed toe shoes. In addition, he was also sporting a top hat, a monocle, a crimson boutonniere, and an ornate sash with the word **MAYOR** embroidered on the front. And to top it all off, he was leaning on a bejeweled walking stick with a blood red ruby for a handle.

Needless to say, Dominator found his appearance most peculiar.

"And just what the flying flurp are you supposed to be?" she asked with her usual degree of tact.

"Oh me oh my, where are my manners? Allow me to introduce myself." The stranger said before giving her a genteel bow. "Nicodemus Alucard Lestat III, at your service. But uh… most folks just me the Night Mayor."

"The Night Mayor, huh." Said the lime-skinned seductress as she searched her memory for such a ridiculous name. "Oh yeah, I think I've heard of you. You're Number 5 on the Leaderboard right?"

"Of which, I am justly proud."

"Oh yeah, that's really impressive. Especially considering that you don't have an army or a proper warship." She said backhandedly. "But it's nothing I'd write home about."

"Ooo!" the Night Mayor said as he clutched his chest in an over-the-top, almost cartoonish fashion. "Lordy, Lordy, the rumors are true. That serpent's tongue of yours can kill a man as sure as a sword. Your reputation is well earned, Lord Dominator."

For the first time in a very, very long time, Dominator was completely thrown for a loop. Did she really just hear what she thought she heard?

"H-H-How?" she stammered, before swiftly regaining her composure so she could reassert her control over the situation. "I mean… So, how did you figure it out?"

"Wasn't hard." The Night Mayor replied casually, before directing her attention to his rather tacky looking eyewear. "Ya see, this here doohickey ain't just for satisfying my ocular fetish. It's what ya might call a sophisticated scanning device that detects and records the unique heart patterns of any blood-based lifeform. And it just so happens that your ticker's tock-tock is a dead ringer for that of Ol' Lava Britches."

"Okay…" said Dominator, sounding more than a little confused. "And you have one of those why?"

"Let's just say, when you get to be my age, it helps to watch what you eat." The countrified man-bat answered with soft but sinister chuckle. "But anyway, I knew from the get-go that you weren't no man. Sure, that armor of yours can fool the eyes and the ears, but this here sniffer of mine can see through just about any illusion. And when I happened upon you during that daring little siege you led on Trilphlamadore last month, even from my hidin' place over half a mile away, I could tell that you stank to high heaven of estrogen and cheap perfume."

"It was coconut body spray, you inbred hick!"

"My mistake." The vampiric politician said casually, apparently unfazed by the insult. "But alas, I diverge from the point. Time to get down to brass-ticky-tacks."

"Ugh! Look Howdy Doofus, you've already proven that you're a little bit smarter than most of the other hacks in this galaxy. Congratulations, you've mildly impressed me. Whoop-Dee-Dang-Doo. What do you want, a frakin' cookie?"

"Oh, no, no, no, my dear lady," replied the Night Mayor in an annoyingly polite manner. "The prize I seek is of a sweeter and much more… personal nature."

'Good Grop, I'm getting a migraine listening to this idiot.' She thought as she rolled her eyes in disgust. "Look bozo, I can already tell where this is heading, so you can save your breath. I already have a boyfriend and his accent is way cuter than yours. So why don't you just buzz off before I snap you like a twig."

At this, the lanky-armed man-bat gave out loud, hardy chuckle.

"Oh Miss Dominator," he said with an almost condescending grin. "You are the livin' end of just-too-muchery."

"I'm the what now?"

"Or, to put it more plainly, I do believe there has been slight miscommunication regardin' my intentions." The dandy bat-man explained. "You see, I ain't here to court ya, Darlin', I'm here to kill ya."

Now it was Dominator's turn to have a good laugh.

"You? You're gonna kill me?" she asked in-between her hysteric guffaws. "Wha…What are you gonna do? Talk me to death?"

"Actually, I was plannin' on bleedin' you to death." He replied with an unnervingly straight face. "But I'm nothin' if not flexible."

But alas, this threat only served to make the younger villain laugh even harder.

"Madame, I am beginnin' to think you ain't takin' me very seriously."

"Gee, ya think?" Dominator asked mockingly, as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Okay String Bean, here's the deal. You put me in a good mood, so for once, I'll be merciful. Just get out of my way and I promise not to crack your skull open like an Easter egg; today. What do you say?"

"I say, that ain't gonna happen, Darlin'" the Night Mayor answered, his tone suddenly turning deathly serious. "You see, I got big plans for this here galaxy, and I ain't just gonna stand idly by while some ditzy debutante from who knows where wrecks up two decades of schemin' with her planet shatterin' shenanigans. So by hook or by crook, you ain't leavin' this here asteroid field in one piece!"

"Tough talk coming from a guy who looks like someone's wacky uncle." The younger villain jeered confidently; which only served to further irritate the elder.

"Appearances can be deceivin', Sugar."

"Meaning what, Count DorkulAHHHHH!"

But before Dominator could finish her clever quip, a sudden sharp pain ran through her right cheek. Acting on instinct, she placed a hand on the afflicted area, and through her glove she felt a warm, sticky substance seeping out of what felt like a very large cut.

It was blood.

 _Her_ blood.

Looking back at the Night Mayor, the lime-skinned villainess noticed that he was still standing in same spot he had been since their conversation began, only now he was licking something off his fingertips. It didn't take a genius to figure out what it was.

"Allow me to be blunt, Miss Dominator." He began; his tone both genteel and mildly threatening. "If you value your life or that sticky sweet nectar you got pumpin' through your veins, you'd do best not to underestimate me. Savvy?"

'Who is this guy?' Dominator asked herself as she struggled to come to grips with what had just happened. Over the past several months, she and her unstoppable army had laid waste to every big name contender this galaxy had to offer; all without breaking so much as a bead of sweat. And yet somehow, this strange looking man, who by all evidence seemed to fly below everyone's radar, managed to draw her blood. And even more amazingly, he somehow did it without being seen. 'Hmmm, this just got interesting.'

"Yeah, I savvy." She answered calmly before summoning her signature lava-armor and morphing her hands into a pair of blades. 'Sorry Pumpkin, but our little make out session will have to wait. This nice gentleman just asked me to dance.'

End Notes:

I had originally intended to make this chapter a lot longer, but when I got to that last line by Dominator I thought to myself, 'why not leave them wanting more'. So that's what I did. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Thanks for all the support. Big fight next time. Peace.


	4. Chapter 4

Hello, and welcome to the next chapter of The Second Date. I don't really have a lot to say this time, so I'll just get right into it. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Second Date: Chapter 4.

Life…

The condition that distinguishes plants and animals from inorganic matter.

The ability to grow, to reproduce, to experience new things, and continuously change until death.

A fitting description, but perhaps a bit too oversimplified.

Life is so much more than just the space between birth and death, and every sentient species in the universe has its own take on the subject.

For example, the Galateans of the planet Skara believe that all people are born dead, and that the only time someone is ever truly alive is when they are engaged in battle.

Dominator had never been to Skara, nor had she ever met a Galatean, but by way of remarkable coincidence, she did unknowingly embrace one of their most sacred beliefs; namely, that only in combat does one truly feel alive.

Unfortunately, as any person who has fought a superior opponent will attest, 'feeling alive' isn't always what it's cracked up to be.

 _ **CHING!**_

 _ **CHING!**_

 _ **CHING!**_

 _ **CHING!**_

Again and again the two forces clashed. Lord Dominator's mighty Lava-Blades vs the Night Mayor's bejeweled walking stick; never before had there been such a mismatched pair of opposing weapons. And yet miraculously, every time they made contact it was a perfect stalemate.

For almost five straight minutes, the two villains fought tooth and nail, and yet, with the exception of the Night Mayor's opening slash across Dominator's cheek, neither had been able to land a single blow on the other.

'Who is this guy?' the lime-skinned villainess asked herself as she attempted to bifurcate her formidable foe, only for him to yet again deflect her blade with that infernal walking stick. Seriously, what was that thing made of? She must have hit it at least a hundred times by now and yet it didn't even look dented; whereas she was being forced to reshape her blades after every tenth swing due to blunting. It was absolutely unnatural.

But even more unnatural was the way this guy moved. Dominator had known he'd be fast, like lightning fast, but she had no idea he'd be this agile too. Those long, lanky arms of his were able to maneuver that cane anywhere he needed it; no matter what insane angle she attacked from. He had to be double-jointed or something. I mean, what other explanation could there be?

To make matters even worse, about a minute ago, the blue-faced man-bat had started singing; just to taunt her.

" _Hack and Slash~ Hack and Slash~ All day long it's Hack and Slash~ Ain't got no Money, Ain't got no Cash~ Cuz 24-7 it's Hack and Slash~_ "

Okay… maybe calling _that_ singing was being overgenerous. It was more like bad spoken word poetry with something vaguely resembling a tune. But whatever you want to call it, it was super annoying; not to mention humiliating. She was Lord freakin' Dominator for Grop's sake, the destroyer of galaxies. And yet here she was, getting big leagued by a guy who dresses like a dandy and talks like he should be dating his cousin. It was… _unnatural_.

" _Hack and Slash~ Hack and Slash~ All day, every day, Hack and Slash~ Ain't got no Friends, Ain't got no Cash~ Just all day, all night, Hack and Slash~_ "

'Ugh! This guy is soooo annoying!' Dominator thought as she tried and failed yet again to land a blow on her irksome adversary. 'But he's also really good. I hate to say it, but I could actually lose this one. I gotta end this fast. Maybe with a… Blood Scythe!'

And with that thought, she morphed her right hand into a long, curved sickle and swung it right at the man-bat's stomach; intending to slice him in half. Unfortunately, a split-second before the blade made contact, the Night Mayor jumped high into the air, did a triple backflip, and landed several feet away with a smug grin on his face.

"Too slow, Sugar Pop." He said mockingly as he readjusted his boutonniere. "Maybe you oughta try somethin' else?"

'Okay… that was weird.' She thought before quickly shaking off her astonishment. 'Well if blades won't work, how about some… Hammer Hands!'

She then morphed her blades into a set of giant mallets and charged towards the dapper man-bat like a raging bull. This seemed to catch him off-guard, as he didn't even try to move until it was already too late.

 _ **THWOMP!**_

The twin hammers collided right where the Night Mayor was standing, and the resounding _**CRUNCH**_ that followed told Dominator that he hadn't slipped away. This pleased her immensely.

"Ha! Gotcha!" she declared with wicked glee.

"No you didn't~" replied a familiar voice casually from a short distance behind.

Overwhelmed with shock, the limed-skinned seductress recalled her mallets, revealing the broken remains of one of Mandrake's robots; which was especially surprising since that hack and his army of antique junk piles were nowhere around.

'Just how fast is this guy?'

"Yoo-hoo~ Oh, Sugar Bear~" the Night Mayor called mockingly. "Are you gonna turn around and face me, or are you fixin' to give up? Cuz if you were ever gonna surrender, now might be the best time."

In that moment, something within Dominator snapped. Then and there she decided that it was high time someone put that smug son of a narf-wrangler in his place. So, to that end, she spun around and held up her right hand.

"Surrender _this_ , Creep-O!"

Then, without any further warning, she fired ten thousand tiny, poison filled darts out of her palm and aimed them all directly at the dandy bat.

'Odds are one of them has to hit you.' The villainess thought cruelly. 'You may be fast, but you're not invulnerable.'

But alas, the Night Mayor did not seem impressed. He just stood his ground with an almost bored look on his face. A couple of seconds before the darts make contact, he held up his bejeweled walking stick and began twirling it in his hand like a high-speed propeller.

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

 _ **Ping!**_

One by one, the darts were deflected by the Night Mayor's infernal cane. Some fell dead to the ground, others were sent flying to places and targets unknown, while still others were thrown back at their maker. Obviously Dominator was able to avoid these, but for the briefest of moments she regretted not bringing her signature helmet.

Eventually, the cascade of darts died down and the dandy bat ceased his twirling. Then, with a dark twinkle in his eye and a smug grin on his lips, he planted his cane and spoke.

"Is that really the best you can do? I must say, I was expectin' somethin' a little more creative from the great and terrible Lord Dominator. Perhaps your reputation has been a bit… _embellished_."

That was the final straw. To say that that last comment made Dominator's blood boil would be a grievous understatement. A more accurate description would be, that last comment turned her blood to napalm.

"Oh yeah!" she yelled, sounding positively livid. "Well if you're so tough, then why don't try something besides just jumping out of the way! Go on, I dare you! Take your best shot!"

Many years from now, Dominator would look back on this moment, and remember it as the single dumbest thing she had ever done.

"You're the boss." Replied the Night Mayor with a saucy grin, before he vanished in thin air.

Less than a second later, he reappeared directly in front of her, and before the lime-skinned villainess could even try to react, he rammed the ruby handle of his walking stick right into her chest.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" she shrieked as a burst of strange jet black energy erupted from the red jewel and plowed straight into her thorax.

Dominator was no stranger to pain. As a matter of fact, the two of them were old friends. But this was unlike anything she'd ever felt before. It was like being struck by lightning, only it was almost… _solid_. It was difficult to explain, but regardless of how you'd describe it, it was intense. Even through her thick molten armor, the mighty villainess could feel this strange energy overwhelming her senses.

For a split-second, she even felt her heart stop beating.

Unfortunately, no sooner did it start up again, then did the Night Mayor unleash seven more, equally devastating attacks. One to the solar plexus, one to each kidney, one to each deltoid, one to her coccyx, and one final one to the left side of her face; sending her tumbling to the ground.

As she laid there, flat on her back like an intoxicated terrapin, Dominator could still feel the strange black energy writhing around inside her; it was like ever nerve in her body was on fire. So great was this sensory overload that for about a minute or so the villainess went blind. Eventually, the pain died down and her sight returned, but as soon as it did, she noticed that her opponent was standing on her chest, pointing the ruby handle directly at her head.

"I had this here doohickey set to stun before." The Night Mayor said as he gave his walking stick a little twist, causing the red ruby to turn midnight black. "But this next one's gonna splatter your brains all over this here mountain. Any last words?"

"Yeah…" Dominator groaned; still feeling too sore to move. "You… deserve better… than fifth place."

This earned her a mirthful chuckle from the dandy man-bat.

"Well, that's awful sweet of you to say, Darlin'. But you and I both know that that newfangled Leaderboard ain't worth squat diddle bunk." He said in a tone that would have been more playful were it not for the deadly superweapon in his hand. "All it does is measure territory. It doesn't measure the things that really count; like skill, or cunnin' or competence."

"Yeah… I guess you're right…" the villainess admitted weakly. "But listen… before you kill me… there's something I gotta know. Who are you?"

This question earned her yet another chuckle.

"Oh~ So the little girl wants me to tell her a story before I put her to bed, is that it?" he asked condescendingly. "Well… I guess there's no harm. But I swear girl, if you try anythin' funny, I'll make that last beatin' I gave you feel like a day at the beach. Savvy?"

"Yeah… I savvy."

"Good. Now then, I guess the best place to start is at the beginnin'." he said before clearing his throat. "Once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away from here, there was a happy lil' planet, full of happy lil' people. However, due to the carelessness and stupidity of two former allies, that happy lil' planet ended up being the casualty of a galaxy wide civil war."

Even in her battered state, Dominator detected a hint of sadness in the dandy bat's voice; not that she really cared.

"Now miraculously, one of the planet's inhabitants survived, but with no home and no family, he was forced to live the life of a wanderer; bouncin' from planet to planet, galaxy to galaxy, for ten long years." He continued, now sounding a little enraged by the memory. "Until one day, he ended up in this here galaxy, with nothin' but the hat on his head and an idea in his noodle. The scheme to end all schemes. The single greatest act of villainy this universe will ever see!"

"Really?"

"Oh, you bet your sweet bippy, Darlin'" the Night Mayor answered, before continuing with his story. "But alas, in order to bring this plan to fruition, the man needed time, and he needed resources, but most importantly, he needed to be left alone. So after weeks of ruminatin' he decided to join the game of Galactic Villainy. But while all the other fellas were busy runnin' around and shoutin' 'Hey look at me' he just stepped into the background and got straight to work."

The Night Mayor paused for only a moment to let out a deep sigh of self-satisfaction.

"For almost twenty years, he hid in the shadows of men like Mandrake, Threat, Awesome, and Hater. Never pickin' a fight with the big dogs, never goin' out of his way to get noticed. Just conquerin' planets one at a time and as quietly as possible. Until one day, not too long ago, a second wanderer came to this humble galaxy. One with powers of positivity far beyond those of mortal man."

"Wander…"

"The very same." He answered with an almost joyous look on his face. "And with his phenomenal friendship powers, this strange being dethroned the galaxy's big capo, and in so doing triggered one of the biggest land grabs in history. Allowin' the man to rise from number twenty-six to number five in a matter of weeks. Settin' his plans a full decade ahead of schedule. Oh~ how he thought it was an act of providence."

Suddenly, his face grew stern and cold, as all the joy from a minute ago was replaced by bitter rage.

"But then one day, a third wanderer washed up in this galaxy, one who jeopardized everythin' the man had worked so long and hard for." The Night Mayor said as he not so subtlety aimed the glowing ruby at Dominator's throat. "Because unlike the first two, this cosmic hobo sought not friendship or power, but only to satisfy her infantile lust for mindless destruction. So in order to protect himself, and his lofty dream, the man vowed to put an end to this arrogant little upstart, by any means necessary."

Before the dandy bat could say anymore, his staff gave off a loud _**DING**_ ; which seemed to put him in a much better mood.

"Oh~ well would ya look at that. It seems I accidentally set this little thingy here to Charge instead of Standby. Which means that while I was busy jawin' away, this little puppy was busy buildin' up enough energy to split that big fancy lava-ship of yours right down the middle." The Night Mayor said with dark amusement. "Ain't that just the bee's knees. And what fortuitous timin' too. Cuz Storytime's over, and I intend to send you off to slumberland with one heck of a bang."

With that said, he raised his walking stick high above his head and prepared to strike.

"Oh, where are my manners?" the dandy bat said in a clearly condescending manner. "Any last, last words, Sugar Pop?"

"Yeah…" the villainess replied, suddenly sporting a weak but cheeky grin. "Look… down…"

Seemingly overcome with curiosity, the Night Mayor complied with her strange request, and almost immediately all the color drained from his dark blue face.

By way of contrast, Dominator's cheeky grin grew wider and more Cheshire-like. She knew from his horrified expression that her would-be killer must have finally realized that while he was blah-blah-blah-ing, she had been stealthily morphing her chest plate into a high-powered magma cannon; the barrel of which he was standing smackdab in the middle of. He tried to run away of course, but, much to the lime-skinned villainess' cruel amusement, he quickly discovered that his ankles were securely fastened to the sides of the barrel via a pair of indestructible shackles. He wasn't going anywhere.

Now, to his credit, the Night Mayor didn't react to this sudden turn of events the way most villains would. He's didn't scream, he didn't cry, he didn't curse, he didn't even struggle. He just looked down at his opponent, spared her an almost respectful grin, and said,

"Clever girl."

 _ **BLAM!**_

End Notes:

Well, that's end of this chapter, I hope you all enjoyed it. Wander will be in the next one. I promise. Anyway, don't forget to fav, follow, and review. And I'll see you all next time. Peace.


	5. Chapter 5

Here's the next chapter. Don't have a lot to say. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Second Date: Chapter 5.

Pain…

Physical suffering or discomfort brought on by injury or illness.

At least, that's the layman's perspective on the subject.

But to those who dedicate their lives to acts of violence, the warriors, the killers, the pirates, the blood-starved animals of the universe, pain is something much more than an aching muscle or a bruised bone.

Pain is alive. It is a living, breathing, omnipresent entity that exists to help separate the strong from the weak; the wheat from the chaff.

Dominator knew this; she knew it better than most because of the life she chose. But she did not fear pain like some villains did. She embraced it, welcomed it, treated it like an old friend.

Why?

Well… I suppose the simplest way to explain it is to say that just because you feel something doesn't mean you have to let it control you. Dominator understood this fact better than most. It was how she was able to destroy so many planets without letting guilt kill her buzz, and it was how she was able to keep climbing up a mountain after taking such a savage beating.

It had been about eleven minutes since her fight with the Night Mayor ended and nearly all of Dominator's muscles were still aching like crazy. For a weapon that had supposedly been set to stun that infernal walking stick sure packed one heck of a punch. Fortunately, now it and its owner were nothing but a memory. After that pointblank blast from her Magma Cannon there was nothing left of the dandy bat save for a pile of smoking ash and, miraculously, his old top hat; both of which were quickly blown away by a sudden breeze.

Good riddance.

With that psycho out of the way, Dominator was finally free to pursue her true goal; to hunt down and make out with her oh-so adorable future hubby.

Fortunately, tracking her precious little Pumpkin was a cinch, since he left a trail of defeated has-beens and never-was' everywhere he went. All she had to do follow the Loser-Brick-Road and then it was Smooch City. Oh~ How just the thought of that sent shivers down her spine.

'Not much farther now.' The lime-skinned villainess thought to herself as she leapt off one of the smaller platforms. 'I can feel it in my gut. Just a hop, skip, and a jump, and then you're all mi… OH SWEET GROP! THAT SMARTS!'

The very instant she touched down on the next landmass, Dominator felt an explosion of pain erupt from her upper right abdomen. She wasn't sure if it was just a muscle spasm or a full-blown tear, but whatever it was it was intense. So much so that the great and terrible destroyer of worlds had to force herself not to cry.

'C'mon Dee, focus.' She chastised herself internally as she struggled to stay on her feet. 'You're better than this. You're Lord Dominator for Grop's sake. Pain is your friend, not your master. Pain is your friend, not your master. Pain is your friend, not your master.'

"C'mon buddy," said an oh-so familiar voice with an oh-so adorable country twang. "Just a few more platforms and I promise you'll get the thing you want most in the universe."

Like a miracle from heaven, the pain suddenly faded away and Dominator was finally able to focus on her surroundings. Much to her unbridled delight, she discovered that the voice from a second ago hadn't been a hallucination. Her sweet snuggly wuggly widdle Honey Bun was indeed standing right in front of her. Well, technically he was about five or six feet away and he had his back turned. But hey, why split hairs?

Ever the trickster, Dominator decided that, just for laughs, she'd sneak up on her future hubby while he wasn't looking. So to that end, she fought back the overwhelming urge to giggle impishly and began tiptoeing towards him. But as she did, she started to notice a few things that she hadn't before.

Firstly, there was the little matter of where they were. Dominator hadn't realized it until just then, but they were almost at the top of the Asteroid Formation, as Wander himself had just said, they were only about five or six platforms away from the 'Ring of Invincibility'. Secondly, for reasons the villainess wasn't really in a hurry to find out, there seemed to be an inordinate amount of banana peels lying around; an oddity even by this galaxy's standards. Last, but definitely not least, the lime-skinned seductress suddenly realized who her beloved wanderer was talking to; none other than his longtime nemesis and current pet project, Lord Hater. Though, judging from the dazed look on his face and the way Wander was shaking him, it was clear that the cloaked king of darkness was totally out cold.

"Hey Hater~ When I get to the top, I'm gonna tell everyone how we're best friends~ Betcha can't catch me!"

Never being one to miss a queue, and already being in the perfect position, Dominator morphed her right hand into a set of glowing tentacles. Then, using the skill and dexterity that made her infamous overnight, the villainess wrapped her loving tendrils around the orange nomad and pulled him in close; making sure that they were staring right into each other's eyes.

"Caught ya~" she said playfully as she treated her handsome captive to one of her trademark Cheshire-grins. "So, what do I win?"

"W-W-W-Where did you come from?" Wander asked with an understandably nervous stutter.

"From the dust, same as everyone else." Dominator answered teasingly. "Oh wait, did mean just now? Cuz if you did, I just followed the trail of losers you left me."

"You didn't hurt anyone did you?" he asked concernedly.

"Who me? Of course not." She replied with mock innocence. "Well~ I _may_ have wailed on a few dozen foot soldiers on my way up here, and I _might_ have killed someone with a Magma Cannon. But other than that I've been a perfect little angel."

Despite the sweetness in her voice, Dominator's sugary words did not appear to be easing his heavy conscious. On the contrary, every syllable was like a knife to his heart and with each one his expression grew more and more crestfallen.

"This is all my fault." He muttered softly, just barely within the villainess' range of hearing, before quickly adopting a louder and much more pleading tone. "Please, I begging you. You have to let me go."

"Oh really~ And why is that?"

"Please, just give me five minutes to fix all this and I promise to let you do whatever you want to me."

"Aw~ I love a man who begs." Dominator said in a cute yet condescending tone. "But alas, no dice. Sorry Shnookums."

"What?"

"Yeah… you see, Oogie promised me we'd have an epic make out session as soon things start getting _really_ crazy, so until that happens, this sixty-way slaughter-fest will go on as is."

"But there are people dying down there!" Wander said pleadingly; in a clear and desperate attempt to appeal to her sense of decency. "Thousands of them! You can't just… wait, who promised you what now?"

"Uh… never mind, forget I mentioned it." The lime-skinned seductress answered nervously, before quickly changing the subject. "Say, why don't we forget about this silly little war for a while and head back to my ship for some _real_ fun?"

"No! Please, let me go!" the orange nomad yelled as he struggled to break free. "Just let me lead Hater to the Ring so I can end this madness! Then I'm all yours, I swear!"

"Ooo~ I love the way you said that last part~" she purred lustfully. "But sorry, still no deal."

"But…"

"Shhh~" went Dominator as she playfully placed a free finger over her beloved's lips. "You've had your spiel, now here's mine. Let's head back to my place so we can both get cleaned up. Then after that, I'll slip into my fluffy white bathrobe and we can spend the rest evening cuddling and doing… whatever else feels _natural_. Sound good?"

"MMPPPHHH!"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEE~ I knew you'd love it~" the destroyer of worlds squealed girlishly as she pulled her captive into an affectionate nuzzle. "Oh~ This is gonna be the best night ever~"

"Now, I wouldn't go countin' your chickens just yet, Sugar Pop." Said an impossible voice from out of nowhere. "Cuz before you do anythin', you're gonna have to go through me first."

And just like that, all of Dominator's romantic plans, as well as a few of her perceptions on reality, were shattered into a billion tiny pieces.

'No… it can't be…' she thought, almost fearfully, as her eyes went as wide as saucers. 'It's not possible… it's just not possible!'

In a state of near panic, Dominator pulled out of her loving nuzzle and turned her gaze toward the source of the impossible voice. And there, standing not ten feet away from her, was none other than the Night Mayor himself; looking exactly as he did during their initial meeting, save for the conspicuous absence of his trademark cane, with nary a cut on his face or a smudge on his suit. If anything, he looked even more spick-and-span than he did before. Which was, as previous stated, completely _impossible_.

"Oo-De-Lally~ Oo-De-Lally~ Well ain't this a purty sight." The seemingly resurrected man-bat said with apparently deep amusement. "Good and Evil. Light and Darkness. Joined together in the sweet and blessed union of mutual affection. Why, it's like somethin' out of an ol' fashioned love song."

He paused, for only a moment, to let out a deep sigh of contentment before her added,

"I'm almost sorry I have to kill you two."

Needless to say, the lime-skinned villainess was at a total loss for words. How was this possible? She had watched this man die less than half an hour ago. She had personally witnessed his flesh and bones turn to ash. She had heard his final screams of agony as the lava tore his atoms apart. No one could fake something like that, he had to be dead. And yet there he was, alive and seemingly untouched. This had to be some kind of trick or an illusion. There's just no way this could be the same man.

"Um… Excuse me Sir," Wander said suddenly, derailing Dominator's train of thought. "I hate to sound rude or anything, but who are you? And… did you just threaten to kill us?"

Now it was the Night Mayor's turn to look dumbfounded; albeit, in a comical and much less serious sort of way.

"Oh me oh my, Oh Lordy Lou~ Where is my head today?" he said overdramatically before treating the orange nomad to a genteel bow. "A thousand apologies, oh savior from another galaxy. I am Nicodemus Alucard Lestat III; Number 5 on the Galactic Villain Leaderboard and quite possibly your biggest fan."

"Uh… thank you… I think." Wander replied politely, in spite of his clear confusion. "It's a… pleasure to meet you."

"Oh~ But the pleasure is all mine, Sir. You've been an inspiration to me for many years now." The dandy bat said in a surprisingly sincere tone. "I mean, when first learned about what happened to Maripoza, it dang near broke even my black heart. All that sufferin', all that loneliness, by all rights it should've killed ya, but instead it just strengthened your resolve. And for that, Sir, I salute you!"

True to his word, the Night Mayor did just that. But all the while, Dominator grew more and more confused. What the heck was this guy talking about? What's a… Maripoza? And why did that word make Wander's face turn so pale?

"H-How…" the orange nomad stammered in frightened astonishment. "How do you know about…"

"Long story." The dandy bat interrupted. "And one you'll never hear, I'm afraid. For to answer your second question, yes, I did. But I assure you, it was no cheap threat. I plan on killin' you folks; right here, right now."

"You lay one hand on him and I'll cut your freakin' eyes out!" Dominator declared boldly as she morphed her left hand into a blade and pointed it threateningly at the vampiric politician; much to his amusement.

"Ooo~" he said with a mocking shutter. "Daddy always said, never run afoul of a woman in love."

"Smart man."

"Well… smart enough, but alas, I diverge from the point." The dandy bat said as he took off his signature top hat and turned it upside-down in his hand. "Now, under normal circumstances, I'd just cut my losses and come back when I'm better prepared. But after a day like today, there's bound to be some major shifts in the balance of power, and with all that hoopla goin' on I'll likely never get a better shot at you than this. So for the good myself, my plans, and the Grand Plague, I end this now!"

And with that said, he reached into the open end of the hat with his free hand and pulled out a small, blue, baseball-like device.

"Your hat…" Wander murmured in hushed amazement. "Where did you…

"That too is a very long story. One that sadly you don't have the time for." The dandy bat said grimly as he pressed a tiny button on top of the device. "Think of it as one last mystery to puzzle over as you shuffle off your mortal coil."

"You're full of it!" spat Dominator suddenly. "I don't know how you're still alive, but I know you're bluffing. I've seen that kind of device before and it's only good for breaking rocks. It wouldn't even scratch my armor. You're just trying to scare us so you can save face. Well, it's not gonna work!"

Unfortunately, this little outburst did not impress the Night Mayor in the slightest. He just sighed and shook his head disappointedly.

"I expected better from you, Darlin'." He said, sounding almost paternal in his condemnation. "I'd 've figured by now you'd know that things ain't always what they seem."

Suddenly, his mood shifted from disappointment to an almost manic enthusiasm.

"For example, this here rock we're standin' on ain't as solid as it appears. According to my scanner, it contains several large pockets of Combustium Gas."

"Meaning what?" asked Dominator in annoyed confusion.

" _Meanin'_ that you and your new beau are about to go on a little trip. One Way Express!" the dandy bat shouted maniacally before he threw the device on the ground between them. " _ **BOMB VOYAGE~**_ "

End Notes:

Well that's it for this one. Hope you liked it. See you in the next one.


	6. Chapter 6

Hello, and welcome to the next chapter of "The Second Date". Not much to say this time around. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Now on with the show.

The Second Date: Chapter 6.

 _ **BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!**_

Just as the War for the Ring of Invincibility was about to reach its climax, the air was suddenly shattered by a tremendous explosion.

First, there came a great noise, like a mighty thunderclap, that shook the earth and rattled the bones. Next, came a powerful, blinding flash of light, that bathed the landscape in an eerie purple hue. Finally, the entire Asteroid Formation was swept up in a terrifying, hurricane-force gale that knocked back the surrounding warships and scattered the rank and file of the Galactic Villain Community like a collection of dead leaves.

Even a certain blue Zbornak, whose tail had been pinned down by an impossibly heavy weight, was caught up in the force of the blast, and carried off with the others.

Twisting and turning.

Tumbling and writhing.

Until, at last, all was darkness.

XXX

For countless hours, Sylvia laid there in darkness. Unable to see, unable to move, unable to think. All she could do was lay there and exist.

In time, never mind exactly how long, her faculties returned; slowly but surely.

Thought was the first to return.

'Uh… what happened? Where am I?'

Followed swiftly by Memory.

'Let's see… Ring of Invincibility… Asteroid Field… Dominator… Wander… wait, WANDER!'

Next came Motor Control.

'Come on Sylvia, get up! Your little buddy's counting on you. Just move your arms… and your legs… and get up!"  
Then Hearing.

'Good Grop, what's that awful ringing?'

Then Smell.

'Oh man, I really hope that smell isn't what I think it is.'

And finally, Sight.

'Ah! Holy Frith! That's bright!'

It took a moment for her eyes to readjust to the new light, but eventually Sylvia was able to get a good look at her surroundings. Much to her relief, she was still on the Blasteroid Asteroid Formation, but on a much higher level; about halfway up the mountain, give or take a few platforms. Feeling a sudden twinge of curiousness, the blue Zbornak took a quick peek over the side of the foreign landmass to survey the damage and, much to her dismay, it was worse than she ever could have imagined.

The explosion had effectively stopped all of the fighting, but the scene below was still the picture of anarchy. Warships damaged or destroyed, flaming wreckage everywhere, foot soldiers scrambling every which way to gather up their wounded. It was complete and utter bedlam. But as Sylvia looked down from her lofty perch and surveyed the mayhem below, only one thought crossed her mind.

'I gotta find Wander and get the heck outta here.'

XXX

Meanwhile, less than half a klick away, a large, mysterious, red and black orb sat motionless on one of the larger, less damaged platforms. For the longest time, all it did was sit there, glowing and smoldering, like a giant ball of molten slag. Then suddenly, almost randomly, a crack appeared on top of the glowing sphere, releasing a powerful burst of steam. Slowly but surely, the crack grew longer and longer; spreading all across the orb in every direction. Eventually, the cracks became so numerous and widespread that the sphere finally collapsed under its own weight; unleashing an even bigger blast of steam.

When the vapor finally cleared, two figures were left standing amongst the rubble. One was a tall lime-skinned female, the other was a short orange haired male, but both looked like they had just gone fifty rounds with a Polarian Cave Sloth.

"Uh…" groaned the male as he picked himself off the ground and looked up at his taller companion. "You… you… saved me?"

"Of course I did, silly…" replied the female drunkenly. "What? Did you think I was lying when I said I… when I said I… said I… um…?"

"Loved me?"

"Yeah! That's the thing."

"No, I knew you weren't lying about that." The orange nomad admitted, sounding more than a little ashamed of himself. "That's… kinda why I got so scared in the first place."

"Oh~ So you admit it now~" the lime-skinned seductress purred in a sort of drunken singsong. "You admit that my poison runs through your veins~ Blackening your heart and driving you mad~"

"Well, if by that you mean I admit that I'm attracted to you, then yes."

"Woo-Hoo! I knew it!" Dominator shouted triumphantly, in spite of the wobble in her step and the daze in her eyes. "In your face, Talking Space Giraffe!"

"Wait, what was that last part?" asked Wander, who sounded understandably confused.

"Well, if you didn't bother repeating it the first time then I'm not gonna listen to it."

"Uh… right… maybe you should sit down for a spell." The wanderer said, sounding genuinely concerned. "I think that explosion might've taken more out of you than you think."

"Oh~ don't be such a worry wert." She replied with a sleepy sort of slur in her voice. "I'm gonna be just…"

But before she could even try to finish that sentence, Dominator fell flat on her back and into unconsciousness. At first, Wander was worried she might have a concussion, in which case falling asleep would be the worst possible thing for her, but after a quick yet thorough examination, he discovered none of the usual physical signs. Once realizing that, the orange nomad concluded that her delirium was likely the result of overexertion, in which case an hour or so in dreamland would likely do her a world of good.

"Thank goodness." He muttered before letting out a deep sigh of relief.

With his admirer safe and momentarily out of commission, Wander headed over to the edge of the asteroid to try and get the lay of the land.

Miles below, he could see the thousands of tiny foot soldiers scrambling to collect their wounded. The fighting had finally stopped, but that did little to lift his spirits.

"How could this have all gone so wrong?" he asked himself downheartedly before looking up into the star-studded sky. "How could I have been so careless?"

As he stared into the infinite gorgeousness that was his adoptive home, the orange nomad thought back to a word he had heard mere moments before the explosion.

"Maripoza…" he whispered with a sad, almost mournful air of longing.

For the first time in a good long while, Wander found himself lost in his oldest memories; the ones that brought him the most joy and the most pain. He thought back to the days when his name was his own and he lived under a sky of amber and aquamarine. He remembered the fields of golden flowers and the silver waterfalls. He remembered sleeping in some cool temple or ruined cistern during the heat of the day, and then after sundown, feasting and song beneath a sea of stars. He remembered the trips he would take to the city and its wonderful marketplace, where the air smelled of fresh barley and there was always music playing. He remembered his old house with the white walls and the thatch roof. He remembered the cute little songbirds that lived in the tree in the backyard. But most importantly, he remembered _her_.

"Tay-Ma Lau," the orange nomad said, in a tongue he had not used in ages. "Ema sok sok sobek. Eva decray ur un la memra ur bela Maripoza. Pleeaz, eku con hier ma, furgave ma un E prema tok mok ut fok ma miss-taki. Nok mate hok lunga et taki. E homba ura con hier ma. E masa ura. E amora ura. Ma bela Stella Lunara."

And with that said, Wander wiped a stray tear out of his left eye and turned back around.

Unfortunately, things were not as he'd left them.

The scene before him was like something out of a madman's twisted fever dream. Dominator was sprawled out on the ground in an odd x-shape, apparently still out cold. Standing directly above her was none other than his faithful friend and loyal companion, Sylvia. In her hands she held a small but clearly heavy ball of solidified magma, which for some reason seemed to have enveloped the tip of her tail. At first, the orange nomad couldn't figure out what was happening, but once he saw the look in his friend's eyes he understood. And this newfound understanding made his blood run cold.

" _ **Sylvia**_!" he shrieked frantically as he rushed to get between his friend and the unconscious villainess. "Sylvia! Please! Whatever you're about to do, just don't! Okay?"

" _Wander…_ " the Zbornak said in a labored voice as she struggled to lift the heavy sphere high above her head. " _Move… out of… the way…_ "

"I will not!" the orange nomad shot back. "Not if you're about to do what I think you are!"

" _Move… now…_ "

"No!"

" _Fine!_ "

And with one last labored groan, the blue Zbornak tossed the heavy orb to the side; accidentally giving her tail a small but clearly painful yank.

"Good…" Wander muttered, before adopting a louder and much more serious tone. "Now, what the heck were you thinking?"

"I was thinking… that Dominator… is a dangerous psychopath…" Sylvia answered in-between pants; her voice betraying her tremendous exhaustion. "And… I was thinking… we'll probably never get a better chance… than this… to end her reign of terror…"

"So what? You were just gonna bash her skull open while she's asleep?" he asked in a tome both concerned and accusing. "Sylvia, that's not how we do things."

"I'm not asking you… to compromise your moral code…" she replied, soundly slightly less fatigued. "I'm just asking you… to step aside… and let me follow mine…"

"Are you listening to yourself?" he asked, sounding deathly serious. "Sylvia, you're an explorer, not an executioner. You can't just go around killing people. It's… it's… wrong!"

"I'm not saying we would should make this a regular thing." She countered, no longer panting. "But desperate times call for desperate measures."

"No! I'm not gonna let you do this!"

"She's a killer, Wander! And she wants to make you one too! She has to be stopped!"

"I agree, but not like this! We have to stop her my way!"

"Your way is what started this whole mess in the first place!"

 _Ouch!_

That last comment cut the hairy wanderer right to the core.

Sylvia seemed to sense this, as her expression quickly softened and her eyes filled with regret, but it was already too late; the damage was done.

"Hey… Wander, I… I didn't mean…" the Zbornak said as she struggled to find just the right way to apologize. "Buddy… I'm sorry. This mess isn't your fault. None of this would be happening if it wasn't for _her_."

She paused for only a second to point accusingly at the unconscious villainess.

"She's a monster. She deserves to die!"

"And I'll bet a lot of people said the same thing about you when you were with Ryder!"

That was a low blow, Wander knew that, but at the time he was more concerned with getting his point across than his friend's feelings; plus, he owed her one for earlier.

"That… that… that's not the same!"

"Yes it is! You did a lot of bad stuff, but you managed to turn your life around. Dominator deserves the same chance."

"Wander, she's a coldblooded lunatic. She's all bad; inside and out."

"You're wrong! I know she can change."

"And what makes you so sure?"

"Because she's just like me!"

A sudden breeze wafted through the barren landscape, and for a while neither of them said a word.

"What!" exclaimed Sylvia, finally breaking what felt like an eternity of silence.

"It's the truth." Wander replied, sounding much less angry than he did before. "Look, my life is really… complicated, and if I hadn't learned how to make friends, I could've ended up just like Dominator, or worse."

"But… that's impossible." Sylvia countered, sounding both confused and concerned. "There's no way you could ever be like her, you're like… the nicest guy ever."

"Only because someone was kind enough to help me turn my life around. If it hadn't been for him, I… I don't even wanna think about what I might've become."

Another sudden silence fell over the landscape, only this time it was Wander who finally broke it.

"Everyone deserves a second chance, and no one deserves to get their skull smashed open; no matter what they've done." He said, sounding more serious than he ever had before. "But if you don't agree with that, and you think you can justify coldblooded murder, then maybe… maybe we shouldn't be friends anymore."

"Wander…" Sylvia replied, sounding positively aghast. "You… you don't mean that."

"Yes I do." He countered sternly. "Sylvia, if you _ever_ try to pull something like _that_ again, we're through; _period_."

It was a harsh thing to say, and it nearly killed Wander to say it, but it had to be said. He knew from experience that situations like these couldn't be resolved with kind words and a song. Sometimes, in order to keep someone on the right path, a little tough love is required.

"So, are we clear?"

"Yeah, we're clear."

"Good," said the furry wanderer, before letting out a deep sigh of relief. "Cuz I really, _really_ didn't wanna have to make good on that threat."

And with that said, he fell to his knees from exhaustion; both physical and emotional.

"Whoa, you okay there, buddy?" Sylvia asked concernedly as she sat down beside her weary chum.

"Yeah, I'm alright…" he answered sullenly. "I'm… I'm sorry I had to come down on you so hard. It's just that… _that_ is a really touchy subject for me. Plus, this whole day has been _really_ stressful."

"Preachin' to the choir, pal." The blue Zbornak said jokingly, only to adopt a much more sympathetic tone seconds later. "Listen, about what I said before. It's true you know, none of this is really your fault."

"Yes it is," Wander said crestfallenly. "Dominator was right about me. I was scared, and I still am. I knew I couldn't beat with my usual tricks, so I came up with this crazy plan to get her off my back, and even though I knew it was risky, I still went through with it. That means everything that happened today is on me, and I'm gonna have to live with that for the rest of my life."

"Yeah but… you were desperate." Sylvia said in a clear attempt to ease his burden. "I mean; you're dealing with a psychotic for Grop's sake. You were totally out of your depth on this one, buddy. Dominator's not like other villains, she plays by her own rules."

"Yeah, I guess she does…"

Just then, someone flipped a switch inside Wander's brain.

"And… so do I. We both play by our own rules." He said, as the gloom in his voice was slowly replaced by newfound hope. "Oh my Grop, that's it!"

"What's it?"

"The Answer… When Dominator brought me aboard her ship, she said her plans for me were just a game, and whenever I try to help someone, I always treat it like a game." The orange nomad explained; starting to sound like his old self again. "We both love games, but we play by different rules. But if we both played by the same rules… OH~"

"What? What is it?"

"Sylvia…." Wander said, as his heart swelled with excitement from his sudden epiphany. "I know how to beat her."

"Are you serious? That's… that's fantastic! How?"

"Okay, after today I know I haven't really earned this, but if this is going to work I need you to trust me and do exactly as I say. Do you think you can do that for me?"

At first, the Zbornak said nothing; though it was clear from the look on her face that this was something she was grappling with. Fortunately, after about a minute or so of silent contemplation, she finally answered.

"Sure thing, buddy. What do you need?"

"Thanks Syl." The hairy wanderer said gratefully before getting down to business. "Okay, first things first, I need you to step back about three feet."

Without saying a word, Sylvia stood up and did just as he instructed.

"Okay, now what?"

"Now I need you to stay there and do nothing." Wander answered. "If my plan is gonna work, I need it to just be me and her. So no matter what happens, no matter what either of us says, please, don't say or do anything. Can you do that for me?"

Once again, Sylvia said nothing, but the look on her face and the subtle nod she gave him, told the orange nomad that she was ready, willing, and able to do as he had asked.

Wander shot her a grateful grin, before turning his full attention to the slumbering villainess.

"Oh Dominator~" he said in a sort of cheerful singsong as he gave the lime-skinned seductress a gentle shake on the shoulder. "Wakey Wakey Eggs and Bakey~"

"Hmmm hasa wha… hasa fafa…" Dominator babbled in a state of semi-consciousness as her mental haze began to fade. "No… never… let me sleep forever…"

"Okay, if that's what you want." Wander said impishly as he pretended to walk away. "I _was_ gonna ask you to be my girlfriend, but if you're too tired…"

Before he could even try to finish that sentence, Dominator sprang up like an atomic powered jack-in-the-box. With her pink eyes wide with excitement and one of her trademark Cheshire-grins threatening to split her face in half, the villainess turned toward the orange nomad and purred softly.

"I'm listening~"

End Notes:

Well, we're in the homestretch now folks. Just two more chapters and The Second Date will be complete. But don't get too worried out there, my faithful followers. Who knows what the future has in store? Well, I do, but you're just gonna have to wait and see. Please remember to follow, favorite, and leave a review before you leave. See you next time. Peace.


	7. Chapter 7

Hello everybody, and welcome to the final chapter of The Second Date. Although perhaps I should say, final 'full' chapter, as there will be a short Epilogue following this one. But regardless, this is the one you've all been waiting for. So… enjoy. Also, Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney.

The Second Date: Chapter 7.

Faith…

The unshakable belief in someone or something bigger than oneself.

In her travels throughout the galaxy, Sylvia had met many beings who had chosen to put their faith in one thing or another. Some chose to put their trust in a higher power. Others in luck. While still others based their entire belief systems solely on the ideal of Universal Kindness.

Naturally, she had never really put much stock into any of that stuff; preferring to trust her own instincts instead of chance or mythical deities. But on the day she met Wander, everything changed.

During that one, seemingly random encounter, Sylvia witnessed something that defied comprehension. Something that altered her entire outlook on life. What exactly it was is not important, and even if it was it is not my place to say; for an exact account I suggest you ask the blue Zbornak herself. All that matters is that on that day, Sylvia finally found something she could believe in, and that something was, you guessed it, Wander.

Granted, this faith was not so unshakable. Wander was constantly testing the limits of her trust in him with his seemingly nonsensical and ludicrous plans. For example, mere moments ago, the orange nomad had, point-blank, asked one of the most dangerous psychopaths in the universe to be his girlfriend. And even more alarming, it looked like she was going to say _Yes_.

Needless to say, Sylvia found this whole situation rather distressing. In fact, every single cell in her body was screaming at her to go over there and put an end to this madness. But alas, she could not. For she had given Wander her word that no matter what she saw, no matter what she heard, she would not interfere. So for the moment, all she could do was stand there silently, and hope to the great and merciful Grop that her furry little friend knew what he was doing.

This was to be her ultimate test of faith.

"When you get right down to it, it's just a matter of logic really." Said Wander in a way that made him sound like a stereotypical used car salesman; unknowingly bringing the blue Zbornak back to reality. "I mean, it's obvious we're both attracted to each other, and like you said, mutual attraction is the first step on the Path of True Love."

"Well… I don't think I used those exact words, but I see what you're getting at." Replied Dominator, who appeared to be forcing herself not to giggle euphorically.

" _Precisely_! So instead of denying our attraction, which we now know can have catastrophic consequences, we should embrace our true feelings and take things to the next level, by becoming a real, honest-to-goodness, _romantic_ couple!" the orange nomad said as he brought his charming little sales pitch to a delightful close. "So~ What do ya say?"

"I say~ Close, but no cigar!" the lime-skinned villainess answered; her voice and expression suddenly turning stern and cold. "You're up to something."

"Who? Me?"

"Don't play dumb, it's _really_ unattractive." Dominator countered, her voice indicating that at the moment she was all business. "And anyway, I can see right through your little charade. You only want to be my boyfriend so I'll let my guard down and you can try to flip the script on me. Well it's not gonna work. I've been planning this game since I was nine and there's only one way its gonna end; with you and me making sweet, passionate love on top of a mountain of shattered weaklings."

The mental images brought on by Dominator's oh-so vivid description of her twisted fantasies were enough to make even a hardened warrior like Sylvia to retch with fear and revulsion. And yet, miraculous, Wander seemed completely unfazed.

"Sounds kinda boring if you ask me." He said nonchalantly.

"Are you saying I don't know how to pleasure a man?" the villainess asked, sounding almost insulted.

"Of course not." The furry wanderer replied politely. "I was merely observing that a game with only one possible outcome is only about half as much fun as one with multiple outcomes."

"Uh… what?"

"Let me put it this way. If you're right, and this game can only end one way, then none of our moves will matter. Because no matter what we do, this game will always end the same way." Wander explained, in a way that was informative without being condescending. "However~ If we were to play a game with multiple, say for example _two_ , possible endings, then all of our moves would matter. Because every action we take would determine the outcome. Thus making for a much more exciting game."

"Hmmm… I see…" said Dominator as she mused over his argument for a moment. "And… what kind of game did you have in mind exactly?"

"Oh~ Nothing all that complicated. Just a simple contest of wills." Wander answered; with more than a hint of mischief in his voice. "You believe you can use love to turn me evil, well, I believe I can do the same thing to you, but in reverse. So I say we become boyfriend and girlfriend and find out who's right."

Under normal circumstances, Sylvia would have shouted ' _WHAT_ ' and rushed over to put an end to such lunacy, but because of her promise, all she could do was stand there and silently panic.

"Interesting~" said the villainess in an unnervingly impish manner. "But tell me, why should I go along with it? In my version, I win no matter what, but in your version there's a fifty-fifty chance of me turning into a prissy little goody two-shoes. Why should I risk my soot-covered soul when I can just go for the sure thing?"

"Because more risk means more fun~" the orange nomad answered tauntingly. "And besides, either way you'll get me for a husband. And isn't that what you _really_ want?"

At first, Dominator said nothing, but her expression changed at least a dozen times as she thought over the hairy vagabond's bizarre proposition. After about a minute or so of almost total silence, the villainess finally slipped back into her usual demeanor and answered.

"Alright, I accept your little challenge." She said with no small amount of bravado. "So what are the rules?"

"Oh yeah, heh, heh, almost forgot about that part. Now, what did I come up with again?" Wander paused for a moment as he tried to recall the rules he'd made up just minutes ago. "Oh right, now I remember. Rule #1: As long as we're together, you can't destroy any more planets."

" _ **No way!**_ " Dominator spat back; her voice sounding almost demonic for a second. " _ **Nothing**_ is worth _**that**_ kind of sacrifice, not even _**you**_!"

"Oh come now, isn't a lifetime of happiness worth a year or so of restraint?"

"Not at the expense of my ship!"

"Say what now?"

"My ship, my Dom-Bots, this oh-so deadly ensemble I'm wearing, it's all powered by Volcanium X; which I can only get by draining the cores of certain planets. So if I don't plunder, I'll basically be a sitting duck!"

"Oh… yeah, that would be a problem?"

"Ya think!"

"Okay, how about this? You can only destroy planets that are uninhabited."

"That won't work either."

"Why not?"

"Because Volcanium X can't be found in just any planet. I have to take it where I can get it. And if the nearest planet I can drain just happens to have people on it, well then that's just gravy."

"Hmmm…" went Wander as he pondered over this perplexing problem. However, after about two minutes of this, he let out one of his trademark _DING_ 's and revealed his latest stroke of genius. "Okay. How about this? You can only destroy planets I don't have friends on."

"How is that any better?"

"Well… at least this way you can plan ahead." He answered, attempting to sound reasonable. "I mean, as long you keep track of where I have friends and plot your course accordingly, you'll never be too far from a place where you can fuel up."

"And just _how_ am I supposed to keep track of a list _that_ long?"

"We can worry about the details later. But between the two of us, I'm sure we'll come up with something _amazing_ ~"

Whether it was due to the idea of her and Wander collaborating on something, or some other sinful depravity cooked up by her diseased mind Sylvia could not be sure, but from where she was standing the blue Zbornak could see a Cheshire-smile forming on the villainess' lime-colored lips.

"Okay, that sounds fair." She said, trying to sound serious in spite of her girlish grin. "Are there any other rules?"

"Yes, Rule #2: Everything, and I mean _everything_ we do must be 100% consensual." Replied Wander, his tone suddenly turning deathly serious. "That means no love potions, no hypnosis, no drugs, no mystic artifacts, nothing otherworldly, extradimensional, or otherwise unnatural. Is that clear?"

"Oh please, as if I'd ever resort to something so cheap and…"

" _Is that_ _ **clear**_ _?_ "

"Okay, okay. Jeez. I promise. Nothing more out-there than new perfume or a bottle of wine."

"Good." The orange nomad said before moving on to his next talking point. "Now, I only have one rule left, but it's the most important one, and it's absolutely nonnegotiable. Understand?"

"Sure, lay it on me."

"Alright then, Rule #3: No more killing. _Period_."

"You can't be serious."

"I most certainly am." He replied sternly. "If you break this rule before one of us wins, then the game is over and you'll have proven to me that we're not meant to be together; consider that the third possible ending."

A part of Sylvia was little unnerved to hear Wander talk like this, but another, much larger part was astonished to see the great and terrible Dominator looking so on edge.

"Besides, it's only temporary." Said Wander as he quickly slipped back into salesman mode. "If you win the game, I won't care anymore and you can kill as many people as you want, but if I win, you won't want to kill anymore anyway. So either way, it's really just a minor bump in the road."

Much like earlier, Dominator didn't reply right away, only this time she remained silent for quite a bit longer. From the turmoil in her eyes and the way her face kept changing, Sylvia could tell that she was really wrestling with this decision. The blue Zbornak almost felt sorry for the lime-skinned lunatic.

Almost.

At any rate, her face eventually settled on a sort of juvenile pout. Then, after crossing her arms and letting out an infantile _Hmmph_ , Dominator gave him her answer.

"Fine." She said reluctantly. "I accept your terms."

"Attagirl."

"So, are there any other rules?"

"No, that was the last one."

"Good, because now it's my turn to lay down the law." Said the lime-skinned seductress as a wicked smile formed across her face; much to the orange nomad's apparent discomfort.

"Say what now?" he asked, sounding both confused and concerned.

"The cornerstone of any healthy relationship is equality." She answered, sounding as though she was reading from a book. "You got to make up three rules that I have to follow, so now I get to make up three rules that you have to follow. It's only fair."

"Yeah… I guess that makes sense." Wander replied, sounding more than a little uneasy.

"So glad you agree, Pumpkin." Dominator purred sweetly, before slipping back into business mode. "Now then, Rule #1: As long as I follow all of your rules to the letter, you can't interfere with any of my villain biz. Which means, I can destroy any planet I want, so long as it's one you don't have friends on, and you can't try to stop me; no matter what."

Now it was Wander's turn to grapple with an impossible choice. Sylvia knew there was no way he would ever agree to such an outrageous demand, but she also knew there was no way he could refuse it. He'd already gotten her to agree to more than she'd ever thought possible, if he backed out now, who knew what she'd do. But still, would the furry wanderer really agree to turn a blind eye to people in need, even if it was for the greater good?

"Alright, fair is fair. I accept your terms." said Wander reluctantly; answering the Zbornak's unspoken question.

"Smart choice." Replied Dominator, her voice dripping with smugness. "Now then, on to the next one. Rule #2: You must take me out on a date at least… once a week."

Compared to her last demand, this one was surprisingly reasonable; which is why Sylvia wasn't the least bit surprised to see her furry little friend thrown off by it.

"Oh… well, that one shouldn't be too hard." He answered, fumbling his words just a bit. "I mean… I was planning on doing something like that anyway, but uh…. Sure, why not make it official."

"Why not indeed." Said Dominator with a girlish giggle; clearly amused by his momentary state of unbalance. "Anywho~ I've only got one rule left, but it's the most important one of all, and its absotively poslutely, unnegotiable. You think you can handle it?"

"Sure." The orange nomad answered before letting out a nervous _GULP_. "Lay it on me."

"Ooo~ Someone's eager to get this relationship started~" she purred teasingly. "Mama like~"

"The rule please, Dominator."

"Oh right, that." Said the villainess with only a hint of embarrassment before moving right along. "Rule #3, and like I said this is the big one: From this moment on, you must always address me by an _adorable_ Pet Name."

"Say what now?" asked the wanderer, unknowingly parroting the thoughts of his closest pal.

"You heard me. From now on I want you to call me by a Pet Name. One that's cute, but not demeaning. And it better not be something cliché, like Honey or Baby."

"What about… Puddin'?"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~" Dominator squealed giddily; at a frequency that would give a dolphin tinnitus. "Yes! Yes! One-Zillion Times Yes~ Call me that! Call me that all the time! Especially in public!"

"Whatever you say, Puddin'~" the furry wanderer said playfully; earning yet another fit of delighted squeals.

While the destroyer of worlds continued to act like a lovesick schoolgirl, Sylvia just stood there in stunned silence. Honestly, she couldn't tell which was more insane; the idea that her best friend was planning to woo one of the most coldblooded killers in the universe with cutesy pet names, or the fact that it was working.

After about a minute or two of eardrum busting squeals and squees, Dominator finally calmed down and started acting like her _normal_ self.

"Okay then!" she said enthusiastically. "I think that covers about everything."

"Eeyup!" replied Wander, sounding equally enthusiastic. "Now all we gotta do is make it official."

"Oh~" Dominator purred sensually; her mind apparently leaping to some kind of wild and undoubtedly sinful conclusion. "And however shall we do tha-HHHUUUUMMMMPPHH!"

It took a moment for Sylvia to process what had happened; for from her perspective, it had all taken place in the blink of an eye. But once the initial shock had worn off, the blue Zbornak realized she hadn't been hallucinating. Her little buddy was, in fact, _kissing_ Lord Dominator.

On. The. Lips.

And even surprising, it had been Wander who'd initiated it.

For several minutes, the mismatched pair locked lips in relative silence; which was only broken whenever one of them, usually the villainess, let out an occasional moan of ecstasy. From where she was standing, Sylvia couldn't tell if they were using their tongues, but based on the look in Dominator's wide, pink eyes, she could tell that whatever they were doing, the lime-skinned seductress was _really_ loving it.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the two separated, and although the furry wanderer was still looking fit as a fiddle, Dominator looked as though she'd just lost a few pints of blood.

"That… was… Amazing~" she said, sounding mildly delirious. Then, without another word, she allowed herself to fall backwards and into unconsciousness; all while sporting one of the dopiest grins anyone had ever seen.

With his now official girlfriend momentarily out of the picture, Wander spun around to face his best friend. And with a grin all his own, and no small amount of swagger, he tipped his hat to the blue Zbornak and said,

"How's that for an opening move?"

End Notes:

Holy hell! This one was a bitch to write; not to mention edit. But I did it. I completed the last 'full' chapter of The Second Date. All that's left now is the epilogue. Thanks again to everyone who's been following, favoriting, and reviewing this series so far. Seriously guys, you're the best. Anyway, thanks yet again for everything, and I'll see you in the epilogue. Peace.


	8. Epilogue

Hello everybody, and welcome to the final chapter of The Second Date. Not gonna drag this out. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Second Date: Epilogue.

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

All across the Blasteroid Asteroid Formation, this is what the people were chanting. Be they Watchdog, Fist Fighter, Wingman, or Automaton, it did not matter, for now they were all the servants of one dark lord.

From high atop his makeshift throne, which had been carved from one of the smaller asteroids in the field, the new supreme ruler of the galaxy looked down on his new minions and smiled. For although his favorite cloak had been ruined and his skull had been so painfully cracked, he felt like a king. And he felt this way because, in spite of the overwhelming odds, he had been the one to claim **it**. The One Ring, with which he would rule them all.

Ever the ham, the dark lord got up from his throne of stone, and in a loud booming voice, he addressed his evil horde.

"Today the Galaxy, Tomorrow the _**Universe**_!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"Hate's Great! Best Villain!"

"YEAH~ BABY!"

But unbeknownst to the new King of the Cosmos, while he was busy lapping up his new followers' praise like a kitten laps up milk, three figures were watching him from an errant asteroid less than half a mile away.

"Think we should tell him that ring's a fake?" asked Sylvia, who was sounding mighty casual in spite of the last few hours.

"Nah," replied Wander, sounding equally casual. "Hater's had a pretty rough day. Let's just let him have this one."

"Yeah, and besides, it'll be _way_ funnier to let him find out on his own." Said Dominator impishly, as she pulled her new boyfriend into an affectionate cuddle. "Ain't that right, Pumpkin?"

"Oh~ Someone's a Naughty Girl~"

"You got that right, Shnookums~"

"I can already tell I'm gonna hate this."

XXX

Meanwhile, on the opposite end of the formation, two figures watched as Lord Hater performed an asinine victory dance in front of his new minions.

One was the villain known professionally as the Night Mayor.

The other was a tall, thin, vaguely humanoid robot, with clawed hands, a see-through cranium, and a long jagged scar on the right side of his face.

Both were looking super menacing.

"Ugh! Just look at those pathetic little cockroaches!" said the robot-man, sounding extremely irritated. "They should be worshiping us! Not that prancing jackass!"

"Language, Doctor. Language."

"I'm not censoring myself, so you can just deal with it!"

"You shouldn't let it get to ya so much. Just let Hater have his fun." Said the dandy bat, in a clear attempt to defuse the situation. "Besides, it's not like any of this matters anyway."

"Yeah… I guess you're right."

"Of course I am, now on to business." The Night Mayor said as he adjusted his signature monocle. "What's the status of the Grand Plague?"

"The latest batch of embryos finished gestating over an hour ago. That brings our grand total up to four hundred thousand."

"Excellent. And how long 'til we have the requisite eight hundred billion?"

"At our current rate of production, I'd say about… six or seven months." The robot-man explained. "But what about Dominator? She could still ruin everything."

"We'll worry about Lord Lovesick later." Answered the dandy bat calmly. "For now, let's just focus on the task at hand. What's my next target?"

"Strategically speaking, I believe Baaaaa-halla is the smartest choice. The locals are skilled fighters, but they value strength above all else. Just take out the Prince and the rest will fall in line."

"Sounds good to me, Doc." Said the Night Mayor as he leaned over the side to get a better look at the scene below. "Sounds good to me."

As he looked down on the thousands of scrumptious, nectar filled little morsels occupying the lower platform, he felt his black heart begin to race, and he started licking his massive fangs.

"Just seven more months," he said quietly, sounding almost as if he was in a trance. "And then the feast begins."

End Notes:

Well, that's the end of The Second Date, but not the end of the story. As some of you already know, I've planned several sequels. I'm gonna be taking a break from WoY for a few weeks so I can work on one of my other projects, but until then, here's a list of the sequels I have planned. FYI: The titles may change.

The Revenge: Coming in May.

The Pillow Talk: TBA.

The Vacation: TBA.

The Breakup: TBA.

The Grand Plague: TBA.

Until next time my loyal readers.

Peace.


End file.
